Pin Up Girls (unlike me) Have Nice Nails

It’s been a wee while since I last blogged and longer since I attempted a Style Dare – with a smashed thumb no less

The dinner lady at my son’s school took one look at the swelling bruise under my thumb nail and muttered darkly that she knew what that was all about. What she wouldn’t do was tell me ‘what that was all about’. Not in front of a queue of children she cautioned me darkly.

Nearly two months later I am none the wiser but at least my thumb looks slightly better:

Typing is a bit less painful. Contrary to everything I learned in my touch typing course I use my right thumb for the bottom row of my Qwerty keyboard.

Through the healing passage of time I can actually fasten up bra straps and jewellery, particularly brooches which are the piece de resistance of this week’s Pin Up Style Dare.

Pin Up Style Dare Solution One

The “Hold your cardigan closed to prevent inadvertent disclosure of camel toe while wearing yoga pants instead of pants” solution.

It is amber which is good for healing inflammation and possibly ugly fingernail injuries. The Minx wore an amber teething necklace for a while and it certainly stopped her from biting me while she was wearing it.

Pin Up Solution Two

The “Chuck on as many brooches as you can because it is a week since you have started the challenge” solution

You can all only hope that it is few more weeks until the next style challenge – you might miss the nail peeling off photos.

I am so pure dead elegant so I am.

Keep your interfering nose out of my lipstick choices darling

Image courtesy of http://www.beautywoome.com

Very few things make me quite as angry as people who claim to know better than me how I should dress myself.  For further evidence of my dislike of being told what to wear see here, here, here, here, here and here. If you are an intelligent and socially aware adult human being you should left alone to wear something that you feel is appropriate to work, unless you are required to wear a branded uniform.

Yet time and again professional woman are being told what to wear most usually by other professional woman.

Accordingly this article in the  Sun-Herald Sydney has pressed all my ranty buttons this morning when I should be hanging with my children and celebrating Mother’s Day.

A style consultant called Alex Frampton has been hired by a number of big city professional firms to ‘present style advice that they were too afraid to give to employees’.

This advice includes:

– you are not going to be promoted or taken to a client meeting if you are wearing a mini skirt or if your boobs are on show

– wear a suit every day including a skirt, stockings, a belt and lipstick.

Funnily enough Ms Frampton appears to have her own boobs well and truly out for her profile on style counsel site The Lives of  a Woman.

Why is it that every woman on the planet seems to have such a strong opinion about what other women should wear?

Will there ever be a stage where we can look at another woman wearing something that we don’t personally like and say – hey, she’s happy – and smile for her?

While writing this the Minx has drawn in lipstick all over the laundry walls. I could give a toss. If I wear lipstick and kiss my children I stick to their hair. I’d rather kiss them so I don’t.

Are glasses the new tattoos?

Circa 1980 body modification started with a vengeance.  At first it was just the odd tiny blue swallow tattooed on a model’s shoulder.

Then through time the ink landscapes grew and were joined by facial piercings – noses, then brows, followed by lips, tongues and cheeks.

Now that multiple tattoos and piercings are commonplace what can a person do to distinguish themselves? Or, if you take the psychology of facial modification as mask to heart how else can you tamper with your features in a way that allows people to look at you differently?

Delta Goodrem seems to have found the answer.

Wear a pair of extremely large dark rimmed spectacles.

Delta’s Geek Girl Glasses.

Delta’s glasses appeared last night on The Voice Australia and then disappeared almost as soon as they had appeared.

This annoyed me. I tweeted about it in a slightly snarky way because I was in A Bad Mood.

On the one hand I applaud any attempt to integrate glasses onto faces. This is because I have absolutely no choice in the matter. Here is a copy of my eye prescription.

The optometrist usually tells me off for not having at least 3 pairs of identical glasses in case something happens to the other two pairs. I’d have to be lead around by the hand without glasses or contacts. It’s been described quite flatteringly as my disability by one eyecare professional.

I have two pairs of glasses now. One for reading things on tins that might cause my children to turn fluorescent at night and the other for finding the first pair of glasses.

I am not a fan of prop spectacles. Prop spectacles are the ones worn by gorgeous models in the glossy optician’s pictures.

And then there are the geek girl glasses.

There are soft porn sites dedicated to girls wearing glasses, sites offering advice on how to wear geek chic and look convincing.

All good for the spectacles wearers amongst us.

Except that when something that used to set you apart from everyone else in a bad way, in a way that has you picked on, when that thing becomes fashionable one sort of starts to acquire a natural dislike for that very thing.

Maybe I should buck the trend and get myself a pair of contacts again.