Life is a journey and you are never to old to start finding out new things. Or finding out old things in new ways.
Thing 1: There are a lot of female bloggers out there
When you meet a lot of people that you know online offline and you know their names and what they cried about last week you are most definitely at a bloggers conference. In particular you are at the Aussie Bloggers Conference. There was some discussion before, during and afterwards that it was the Aussie Mummy Bloggers Conference or the Aussie Women Bloggers Conference. Accordingly there were only about 6 men in the entire room. Next year, single chaps get your tickets early. You will definitely get a lumber*.
Thing 2 People are either much taller or much smaller or have weirder knees than you expected
My father is obsessed with Charlton Heston and not in a good way. When we watched Planet of the Apes he regaled us with the time that my sister in her toddler years walked into Charlton’s legs.
“He had weird knees” my dad said ‘it’s probably due to your sister walking into him“.
I didn’t notice anyone’s knees on Saturday but I think I might have been only one of 120 people who met Bern Morley and squeaked ‘aren’t you tall?‘. She said that it was her platforms but I’m not convinced. Jayne Kearney on the other hand was 4 foot 11 without her heels but I still managed to recognise her across a crowded room. You should know that she helped me with one of my first serious blog posts. The one that no one other than the Not Drowning Mother has ever commented on, strangely enough.
Thing 3 There is ABSOLUTELY no such thing as One Size Fits All Knickers
These were the knickers that I was wearing for the Aussie Bloggers Dinner Dance.
This series of photographs taken by Fiona Lumsdaine of Lumsdaine Photography I believe records the moments before, during and after the point that I realised that my tie up knickers:
(a) had become untied due to an abundance of arse shoogling and silly moves for which my dancer partner Kristin of Wanderlust was jointly & severally liable; and
(b) were working their way not particularly slowly towards the floor.
What did I do next? What do you think?
Sandals: Urban Sole
Dress: Gasp by Emanualla Silk Halter Dress (a car load of gay guys on Crown Street asked me where I got it).
Knickers: See above, below and never again in public.
* Lumber: A Scottish word for hooking up with someone with whom one would like to lock lips at a social occasion. Also known as ‘getting a click’ as opposed to a clip round the ear one supposes.