The Burning Questions

The Haggis

People, meet the Haggis.  The Haggis is a traditional Scottish dish. It is an acquired taste, a bit like say parsnip & Jerusalem Artichoke soup with gorgonzola.  Or oral sex.

On Monday night  just gone by my husband and I with the help of a  Scottish chap (called Scott) introduced a bunch of non-Scottish to the concept of the Burns Supper.

Pardon the puns but the Burn-ing questions of the evening were (in no particular order):

Who was Robert Burns and why are we having a supper for him?” It has been said that the haggis is a timid mythical creaure that roams the Scottish Higlands. Robert Burns was born at or around the time of the first sighting of this strange and wonderful creature. According to Scottish legend, which has borne the test of time, the best way to capture a haggis alive is to:

(a)   read it the poetry of Robert Burns; or

(b) play the bagpipes to it until it falls over in delight and waves its little legs in the air.

You then have a short window of opportunity in which to leap upon it,  truss it up and chuck it into a pot of boiling water. Otherwise it goes off. Or bites you.

Do you really eat Haggis?” Yes you do and we did. One or two people actually came back for seconds. James came back for thirds. It is particularly delicious when you pour a measure of neat malt whiskey over it beforehand. In fact, if you have a Burns Night without vast quantities of single (not blended) Scotch whisky neither the haggis nor your guests will be happy.

How did you match your shoes to the Haggis?” I didn’t. I matched my shoes to my kilt which was predominantly red with a few green checks, as they usually are. The kilt label suggests that it is the Lili (Mac)Gaufrette tartan. Obviously to protect my anonymity, I won’t be divulging whether or not it is my clan tartan.

Are you wearing your kilt according to customary Scottish military tradition?” That was for me to know and you to find out.  If you didn’t get the chance to do so you will just have to come along next year.

13 thoughts on “The Burning Questions

    • You realise of course that the legs are just a blatant attempt to attract more readers. On that matter, I feel that I am likely to be asking you for a place on the Australian Female Bloggers Shark Jumping Team in the next Olympics.

    • My husband has tasted barbequed armadillo presented in its shell. It doesn’t taste like haggis. He has also come across dead wombat and it doesn’t look like haggis. It is a scary looking critter but a tasty one. We have leftovers *evil grin*

  1. the image of it waving its legs in the air was gorgeous – of course first time i read it, i read that the bagpipes would be overcome and wave their legs in the air – which also made me laugh 🙂 either way a winner 🙂

    • The playing of the Bagpipes (at close proximity) always sounds like several small creatures in a bag being slowly and horribly disposed of. Many is the time that I have wanted to overcome and tie up the bagpipe player.

  2. I literally learnt about Burns Night a few days before the event. I would love to attend one, one day. It might be hard for my largely English tongue to learn to read Burns’ poetry out loud, alas.

    I had haggis once and am keen to try it again. If I ever make it back to England, I will visit Scotland just to do so.

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